Love, not fear…

Not a big topic then!

I started to write this post, inspired by a Good Friday meditation, and almost immediately got paralysed by fear…

• “What a huge theme!”
• “Who am I to write on such a subject?”
• “How dare I even begin to think I know anything at all about it?”

How ironic…writing about fear, to become enveloped by fear…

And yet, this is exactly what I want to write about – fear (and its children, anxiety and worry) are all around.  They don’t just come out as a stranger attacks us on a dark night. They are everyday companions.

How many of us can say we never feel fear?  How many of us, however much we may think we know, are free of fear?  No-one.

I once had two seminal teachers, Brad Brown and Roy Whitten.  They taught that fear kept everything in place– all the things which keep us from love.  Fear is like a plug.  Imagine an hour-glass, with the negative below and the positive above.  Below are all the things which keep us separate – the dramas, beliefs, expectations, judgements, decisions – all held in place by fear.  None of those separating things can live without fear.

Above are all the things which connect us – truth-telling, choosing, creating and gratitude.  And the key to unlock these things is noticing.  Noticing when we are separate, noticing when our dramas are ruling the roost, our judgements drawing the line between “them” and “us”, noticing when our decisions about the world lock us in to being “right”…

So when my fears come up –

• “Who am I to write on such a topic?”

• “They will think I am above myself.”

• “You have to be a guru to write about fear and love.”

my first job is to notice.

That’s all.

My first job is to notice what is going on.

Notice the thoughts, (“I am not good enough”), notice the results (I procrastinated wildly before getting down to writing), notice the feelings in my body, (a sort of panic around the chest).

And this all happened in moments.  Nothing special.  Just an everyday sort of fear. My survival is not in question.  On one level, it doesn’t matter whether I write this or not.

But it does matter to me that my impulse to create something out of a profound meditation comes to fruition. It matters that I don’t squash my creativity.

It matters that fear doesn’t “win”.

Notice

This is the first thing.

Notice the littlest things – often fear wants to hide and disguises itself as “something better to do,” or “I’ll just have that snack”.  Loving yourself starts with noticing, without judging, what exactly is going on….

Truth tell

This is the second thing.

• “Even though I am afraid, I love and accept myself”.

• “Even though I want to eat some chocolate right now, I accept myself exactly as I am”.

• “Even though people might think I’m above myself, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

And those are all tappable issues. With EFT tapping, you can dissolve the fear, dissolve the power that fear has on you, which leads us on to the third thing.

Choosing

When fear is banished, there is room to choose.  Choose light, choose hope.  Choose not to eat the snack, choose to go ahead anyway….

And of course, without fear, you have access to so much energy.  Energy just seems to pour into us when we are not afraid….amazing!  Which leads us onto the fourth thing.

Creating

Wouldn’t it be great to be more creative?  To be doing more than “getting by”. To be adding to the world….whether in the arts or home making or business?  To find your own creativity and give it substance and voice?  You can do that, when fear has lost its power…  And when there noticing and truth telling and choice and creation, then there is…

Gratitude

Gratitude arises naturally out of shedding fear. It seems to come from a deep well of connection with all that is. You can’t force gratitude.  It just happens. But that sweet feeling of gratitude is the feeling of being connected, of not being separate.  It is the feeling of love.  Love, not fear.

This is why I am so grateful for EFT tapping as a vehicle for transformation.   There are many paths, but EFT is so user friendly!  You notice you are feeling a bit “off” and you tap, then you feel better.  In its very basic form, it’s that simple.  Of course, we can take it down all sorts of routes and byways, but its basic job is to clear.  And the most basic thing to clear is fear.

So notice the everyday.  Notice those little things.  Notice the small fears.  It’s worth it.

What sort of “little fears” get in the way of your transformation?